I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
