I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
