handjob tips. give me some.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
