the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Randomize
