You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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