My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
