just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
