Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
