It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
