So drunk, too bad you don't want this
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Randomize