Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
