Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
YOURE A FUCKING ADULT. DONT TELL ME ITS PAST YOUR BEDTIME WHEN I WANT TO GET ANOTHER COCKTAIL.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Randomize
