IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Randomize
