Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
