You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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