Nicole vs. Life
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
