Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
