just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
