Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
