It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Randomize
