I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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