Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Randomize
