you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
