it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
