it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
did i just pee glitter
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
