So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
