Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
