i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
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