wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
