Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
