Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
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