I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
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