your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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