Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Just found some confetti on my nipple if that's any indicator of how the night went
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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