Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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