Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
