I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
The best revenge is premature balding
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
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