my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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