ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
