Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
