I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Is Oprah even human
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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