i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
