i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
