Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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