I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I had a dream last night that I had to pretend I liked Dave Matthews Band to impress this girl I was talking to.
I guess it was more of a nightmare.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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