guys are not supposed to queef...right?
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Randomize
