she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
True strength comes from lack of pants
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
