Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
