How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
