I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
